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My Extra Marital Affairs

by Vimala Ramu
(Bangalore, India)



Marriage is the most wonderful institution that mankind could have ever thought of no matter what the modern singletons say about it. Whatever their opinions about it are, nothing can beat the blissful marital status. Apart from some unfortunate few for whom the very sight of each other is anathema or those who keep harping on wanting their ‘space’, I am sure every couple cherishes the proximity of each other. Each couple has its own preferences in these matters. Some like to keep ringing up and keep in touch. Some believe in proximity through actual physical contact (Like the couple who were doing a close dance in a party and exited out of the party as a single unit!). Some couples prize their mental and intellectual proximity through similarity of views and attitudes. Some write immortal epistles to each other. Ramu and I thrive on spatial proximity. Though more than fifty years have passed after our marriage, I cannot imagine spending my time in a room other than the one occupied by my husband, unless otherwise engaged. I am not ashamed to confess that the most exciting moment of my life has been when he comes home after every outing.

Proximity need not mean actual contact as I said earlier. Metaphorically speaking, it should be like what the great Sanskrit poet Kalidasa has said about the divine couple Shiva and Parvati, ‘Vag arthaviva samprukthau’_ As closely
knit as the ‘word’ and its ‘meaning’.

In spite of this magnificent obsession with each other (Incidentally though our shastras condemn extreme attachment to anything material in this world, no shastra is against the holy attachment between lawfully wedded husband and wife), there is a time everyday when I take leave of my husband and meet my boyfriends and spend sometime with them. I like to spend 45 minutes in the evening everyday on the terrace (3rd floor) with them under the open sky surrounded by the thick foliage of the tree tops, undisturbed. With the I- pod plugged into my ears I love to listen to my favorite songs from Hindi films of 60’s and 70’s sung by my boyfriends, the immortal idols singing for me and for me alone- Talat Mahmood, Mukesh, Mohammed Rafi, Jagjit Singh, Hemant Kumar, Kishore Kumar and Manna Dey. With the melodious music in my ears, with all the clouds gathering in a constantly changing display around the pink setting sun and the birds returning in batches to their nests, I am transported to a different world where ugly words like ‘Rheumatoid arthritis ‘ are forgotten. Sometimes after a light drizzle nature gifts me with a rainbow high in the skies above the tree tops. Coming out of trance after 45 minutes walk on the terrace, I return to my husband refreshed to be his soul mate once again.

*****



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Apr 01, 2013
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Thanks
by: vimala ramu

Thank you Safia though it tickled me no end to see the misprint 'martial' instead of 'marital'. In some families sometimes it is more 'martial' than 'marital' though !!!

Mar 30, 2013
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Nice one
by: Safia

Nice one!Its always nice to read about Martial love and love for music also makes an interesting read.

Mar 20, 2013
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thanks
by: vimala ramu

So happy as always to see a comment from you, Eva. Well, as for revelations, life is still on. So you can still await them!!!

Mar 20, 2013
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My Extra Marital Affairs.
by: Eva Bell

I sure enjoyed your article Vimala.
Extra Marital Affairs? I thought you were going to let us into some spine-tingling excitement.An ingenious way to claim your space for a little while!
Its great to know how closely you and Ramu bond. I wish the younger generation would learn from your article.

Mar 08, 2013
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closely knit
by: vimala ramu

Hi Geeta, when there are great poets like Shakespeare and Kalidasa, why wrack your brain for your own words:)

Mar 08, 2013
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Ideal Romance
by: Geetashree Chatterjee

As closely knit as the word and its meaning ...WOW!

Mar 06, 2013
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Hindi
by: Anonymous

Ramu and I are alike in one respect. . Both of us hate HIndi. But I like Hindi songs of yester years.
I agree with your last line in Hindi.

Seetharam

Mar 06, 2013
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anonymous
by: vimala ramu

Sneha,Thought the anonymous comment was yours. Well, my dear 'daughter', thanks for the lovely comments.

Mar 06, 2013
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Aha!
by: Sneha

Ha ha... you two are the ideals why I think marriage can be blissful. Well, personal opinion, if I'd have been your daughter, I'd rather sit with daddy dearest ! Knowing Uncle is entertainment and wit enough..

Mar 06, 2013
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Lucky
by: vimala ramu

That's where you are wrong, Seetharam. Ramu hates Hindi and Hindi film music. That's why the I-pod, no piping it all over the house.Teda hai, phir bhee mera hai!!

Mar 06, 2013
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Thanks
by: vimala ramu

Thanks for the impossible wish.

Mar 06, 2013
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Thanks
by: vimala ramu

THANK YOU, SONAL, NICE TO HEAR FROM YOU.

Mar 06, 2013
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Lucky
by: H.R.Seetharam

What a lucky bloke Ramu is ! Must be the only husband who loves the wife's boy friends too, I am sue !!
Seetharam

Mar 05, 2013
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CENTURY PLEASE
by: Anonymous

May it last for another 50 years



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--by admin

Mar 05, 2013
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Awesome
by: sonal shree

Beautiful to the core :)

Mar 05, 2013
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Shocking
by: vimala ramu

Ha, ha, Pankaja, got you there!

Mar 05, 2013
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shocking!
by: nuggehallipankaja

Oh God Vimala,you nearly shocked me by your title!

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