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I Am Not A Superwoman!

by Usha R
(India)



My work is unfinished, my house is not tidy. When reading out bedtime stories I doze off before my kids do. I make every effort to catch up but I feel I am not able to competently sustain everything I am doing. I feel like I am failing my family, miserably. Are you a woman who thinks the same?

A mother, a cook, a nurse, a maid, a protector, at times a referee too and many many more… a series of responsibilities taken up by many of us and being impeccably glorified as a multiple-role woman or the Superwoman with an imaginary cape. Be it a "domestic goddess" or a "career woman", Superwoman signifies the potential of a modern woman who juggles the various roles in her life with ease and a million dollar smile. The special woman who chooses not to give up on her family because she feels they look up to her. The idea of engaging in multiple roles simultaneously has become a valued social norm. But the question is do we actually like or want to be a Superwoman? Why do we wish to fall within this norm? Do we realize that at some point we need to hit the brakes and stop being resilient? Is it the fear of failing in front of our loved ones? The fact remains that no woman is born with multiple hands nor has the number of hours in a day increased from 24 to 48 hours.

In the process of being a perfectionist, not only do we pile up stress and an umpteen number of emotional and physical symptoms but also inadvertently set near-impossible benchmarks for our daughters who conventionally assume that in the future they too have to live up to these set standards, and of course our sons who expect their future partners to be a reflection of their mothers as they are unintentionally groomed into believing that being a superwoman is a natural feat for every lady.

Beyond a certain point, being a Superwoman only has a detrimental damage to our health and happiness. Enjoying moments of leisure is an essential necessity to keep ourselves happy and also those around us. So we do need to make choices and reduce our to-do list, learn to delegate and ask for a helping hand, make the ones dependent on us a little independent, and sometimes just let go off being a perfectionist and stop being stoical. Indulge in some "me" time, spend some time with yourself, enjoy your leisure time and pay some importance to self-care. Holidays should be your rest day too. Refocus your energy on some of your hobbies. Sit back, relax and spend some time with your family. The rightly so called empowerment sets in when you realise that if you are a Superwoman for your family, YOU are a part of that family too.

It's okay not to be a superwoman all the time. Basically there is no such thing as a Superwoman. The fact is that you can't do it all, sometimes you need help. Be gentle with yourself, you are doing the best you can. Always remember, life is a one-time offer, use it well!

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Jan 03, 2021
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		I can relate
by: Swarna

I can relate to this write up word by word, piece by piece. I felt like this was narrated for my mom and my family. So blessed to have such a read.
Jan 06, 2021
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		Women of Today!
by: Asha karkera

Yes, it's so important for women to know that it's ok to not be perfect all the time. You are doing the best you can and that's all that matters. Thanks for this lovely article. Made my day!
Jan 06, 2021
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		Superb
by: Your Name: Anita K

Rightly said. There's this notion that women are supposed to be like a superwoman doing everything perfectly. Hope this article reaches more people and they learn something from it.
Jan 17, 2021
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		Just be you
by: Your Name:Preeta Shashikumar

True..There's nothing like Superwoman. It's just a fictional character in comics and movies. It's a myth "I have to do it all" . Its upto the my woman to change the perception created by movies. It's just not possible to please everyone everytime. Woman knows her duty.Just be yourself.s and do your duty. There's no need to over do anything. Very good article.
Jan 27, 2021
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		The Hidden Truth
by: MV:

The article aptly portrays the everyday struggles of a woman either as a home maker or contributor to family income. The rigid mindset and expectations to strike the balance perfectly in all endeavors unfortunately dumps waves of stress for HER; but it goes unnoticed. Unless the traditional ideology is reversed and freedom of woman is accepted in true sense, the concept of Gender Equality is just a myth.
May 09, 2022
Rating
starstarstarstarstar 		You said it
by: Paddu Menon

Very nicely said and it rings in all our feelings. A mother is not a superwoman just let her BE!

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