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The Villain in my life!

by Vimala Ramu
(Bangalore)




It so happens that I don’t belong to a family where daughters are bought specs along with a wrist watch as part of their accessories in their teens along with jewellery, as a matter of routine. I never had to use specs till I reached the age of 40. This was necessitated when I took up an assignment as a maths teacher after finishing my B.Ed. I found that I could not see the powers in the algebraic quantities clearly in the text books. Earlier, I had had difficulty in threading a needle and in making out the cricket score on the TV screen, but going in for specs became imperative when my profession required it.

So, I prevailed upon my husband to take me to the optician on M.G.Road as he could also consult the doctor for his own problem.

The doctor made me duly read the letter chart in the mirror, tried different lenses on me. I could see that he was quite amused. He told me, “Your husband seems to have neglected his problem for quite sometime. But you seem to have come on the very first day you had trouble!” I tried to justify myself by explaining all my problems. He prescribed reading glasses for me which I was supposed to put on only while reading, a tedious process where teaching was concerned. The constant ‘taking off’ and ‘putting on’ not only bothered me but distracted the students also.

Next I had to get used to leaving the specs in a safe place, because, I found that the specs had a mind of their own. They were very fond of occupying my seat just before I chose to sit on a particular one. Thus with twisted and broken glasses the replacements had to be made quite frequently. Thank God for Ramu’s habit of buying 2 (pairs) of each purchase.
I keep teasing him that ‘wife’ was the only commodity for which he didn’t buy a spare!

Slowly I graduated to the bifocal stage. One gratifying thing I discovered was that I had been equipped with a nose with a normal bridge and my two ears had been placed symmetrically on either side of the head. So, I did not need any custom made frames but could do with a general pair.

So now it was getting used to the two levels as presented by the bifocals. I would go goose stepping whenever I had to negotiate steps.

But what I enjoyed about the new specs was, what I thought was a splash of green colour on the trees was actually a set of clearly visible leaves. What was a blur in the book suddenly became a set of well printed individual letters. I could not only make out the cricket score in the corner of the TV screen but the weave of the player’s shoelace too!

But the blessing turned into a curse when what I thought was a lovely complexion with shiny black hair in the mirror was actually a mass of wrinkles and spots with shaggy pepper and salt (more of salt!)hair. The people around me who I thought were very handsome turned out to be hairy and rough skinned. The unkindest cut of all was on my weighing scales. What I had thought was 58 all along turned out to be 60 when I put on my specs. Surely, my specs couldn’t be weighing 2Kgs! What other explanation could I give for this sudden increase in my ‘slim’ body?

Thus my glasses which could reveal to me a beautiful set of discrete units of nature and fonts could become a villain too in my life. But, there was no way I could get rid of it except GROWING YOUNGER !

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Nov 10, 2012
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Thanks
by: vimala ramu

Thank you,dear Kanthi. When and how did you find time to read this?!!!

Jul 21, 2012
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Enjoyed it
by: Kanthi

Very funny article about a mundane thing as specs !

Jun 10, 2012
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thanX
by: vimala ramu

Thank you Isabel. I am enjoying the pictures you are putting on FB.

Jun 09, 2012
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as they say...
by: isabel

As they say the truth hurts, same way how your funny story and experience with your HD view of the world thru your bifocals! :)) Enjoyed it so very much...

Jun 07, 2012
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kink
by: vimala ramu

Yes, Eva, so long as the kink in my brain continues, my captions will continue to be wonky!!!

Jun 07, 2012
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The Villian of my life.
by: Eva Bell

When I saw the title I thought this was going to be titillating. Bifocals? You do have the gift of making us laugh.

Jun 06, 2012
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Thanks
by: vimala ramu

Thanks. I have been reading the comments on Mouthshut.com on your review of COLORS. Looks like you have motivated quite a few to purchase the book. Nobody can resist such an excellent review.

Jun 06, 2012
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As usual...
by: Geetashree Chatterjee

Enjoyed thoroughly...

Jun 05, 2012
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Mohit's pictures
by: vimala ramu

Thanks for your 'ha, ha'. I liked Mohit's pictures on Iww. Hope you will overcome all your problems soon.

Jun 04, 2012
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..............
by: Sneha

Ha Ha Ha Ha :-D !!

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